You do You. Exactly as You See Fit.
Last week I was reading an article on the pros and cons of having a full-time business versus having a side hustle. Among the pros of having a side hustle - diversification, peace of mind, and a competitive advantage in your job. Among the pros of having a full-time business? You have faith in your business. Because, by quitting your “you are telling yourself that you know your business idea can and will work.”
“Fuck that noise!” I thought to myself and slammed the computer shut.
For the past 15 months, I’ve been one of those people with both a job and a business. Though, with 50+ events a month, a leadership team of 20+ and a lease for 2000+ sq. ft., I hardly classify the SheHive as a side-hustle - but it’s not my main income. My main income comes from a Fortune 500 company where I spend a large portion of each week serving as the Chief of Staff for a team of 200+ coaches on three continents that are helping to fundamentally shift the work culture.
I chose to take the job because I realized, about a year after leaving my full-time career, that I missed the work. I didn’t miss where I had been doing it in the past, but I missed being at the center of a large-scale, complex change initiative.I missed being part of a large team day-in and day-out and I missed the certainty of knowing where I would be when and how much I would be paid to be there.
Taking the job fulfilled much of what the SheHive couldn’t. It also alleviated a lot of pressure, freeing me - and the rest of the team at the SheHive. When my ability to follow a wild dream wasn’t so closely tied to my ability to pay my student loans, mortgage and car note, it was infinitely much easier for me to radically experiment and create something completely new.
I believe in my business. I believed in it enough to quit a decades-long career and build it. But it isn’t all I am and I had needs it couldn’t meet.
I share all this not to defend my choices or to debunk a total shit article (okay, not total shit - but largely shit). I share it debunk a myth that we are all one thing or another, but can’t be both. We are employee or an entrepreneur. A all-in mother or a career woman. A sexpot or a feminist. A confident badass or a sniveling wimp. A bleeding heart liberal or a pragmatic realist.
Lovely, I am a hybrid of all of those things and more - usually all in the same day. Sometimes in the same hour.
No one gets to dictate what defines a fulfilling life for you, but you.
I admire the women that leave it all behind to open a life-long dream and never go back to corporate America. Just as I admire the women that live for a steady rise within four corporate walls and - hopefully - above a glass ceiling. And I hella-admire all of you that do both, because it’s hard AF.
You do you, lovely, exactly as you see fit.
Are you living a life that others don’t quite understand - or judge because it isn’t what they think you “should” be doing? I’d love to hear about it! Leave a note below in the comments so we can celebrate the unique badass that is you.
8/1/2019 09:04:33 am
Love this! And it so resonates with me on many levels! As someone who's defined herself as an information professional for almost 20 years - I've challenged myself to keep thinking myself of other things too. Also: as a very happily-single woman, I feel others' "should" of "why aren't you dating?" "you're so great/pretty/insert-whatever-the-fuck-adjective". This reinforces that I don't have to qualify who I am for them.... Thank You!
8/1/2019 09:21:05 am
Ursula - I love this post! We are all those things and to be around ambitious women who are all these things and more empower me to try new things, go after new ideas, and work a full-time job while also trying my hand at real estate. I'm reminded that there are so many women defining, each day, who they want to be and how they want to live their lives. It's very inspiring!
Ursula! You always give voice to the REAL DEAL in life. With mommyhood I’be been juggling all kinds of identities and feeling all kinds of feels about what I should/could be doing. This post was so divinely Timed (as most of your posts are!). Love it! Also I’m still ready to buy your book when it’s done (will def be a number 1 best seller!)
THANK YOU!! I also do both. Sometimes I feel it should be one of the other, but both have their advantages. I too work for a big company, which gives me so much insight, helping me in my business AND sometimes I like walking into our large, corporate office and be part of something big! LOL. Glad to hear, I'm not the only one!!
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