Who's helping? (And are you letting them?)
Good morning from Hilton Head Island, South Carolina - the first stop of the Adams’ 2017 Year-End Road Trip!
The Mister and I left Detroit late, late Christmas night. The roads were insane - snow-covered and slick. Cars were, literally, spinning out in front of us and bouncing off the guard rails. I clenched my jaw at Cadieux and 94 and only unclenched it to yell, “Slow, down!” or, “You see that car spinning out in front of us, right?!” or “Get out of this lane NOW or I WILL KILL YOU!” until we got to Columbus, Ohio, and clear ground.
Our road trips always start out like this, even when the roads are clear. When we are home I drive everywhere because I know the Detroit streets like the back of my hand. But when we get on the road, Mr. Adams drives because he loves to and I love to stare out the window and explore. Relinquishing control and putting my safety in the hands of my co-pilot is always a process.
Thing is, my co-pilot is not only trustworthy - he’s a professional. Seriously. He’s licensed to drive everything from a train to a forklift to a semi to a car. In fact, the only thing the government hasn’t given him permission to pilot (yet) is an airplane. This is kind of his thing - he likes to learn how to maneuver vehicles like I like to learn how to maneuver change.
I have chosen my co-pilot wisely and as soon as I remember that, the journey always becomes much, much more enjoyable.
I have had some pretty miserable co-pilots in my life, metaphorical and otherwise. Before I got smart about myself - and about life - I handed the reigns over to many, many people who had not earned the right to help steer my journeys. My current co-pilot always suffers the brunt of my past until I remember he’s pretty awesome.
We’re all about to undertake a new journey… 2018.
Who are the co-pilots that are going to help steer the journey for you? Have the earned the right to help? And, if so, are you letting them? Do you make them suffer the memories of miserable-fucks-of-old? I’d love to hear about your navigators - drop me an email or leave a comment below.
With much love and gratitude,
Ursula Adams, MSPOD
SheHive Founder and Leadership Coach
P.S. The facilitators at the SheHive are carefully vetted co-pilots. They don’t get to help anyone carve out a path until they’ve learned how to do so in a way that is grounded in compassion and empathy and backed by research. We're a good road crew!
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