SHEHIVE: A PLACE TO BECOME AND TO BELONG
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100 days of beautiful crazy

2/3/2017

 
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“Just give it a try for three months. When are you ever going to have another free chunk of time like this in your life that you can devote to this dream?” 

I had just quit my job and I was talking with my mentor about my next steps. I didn’t want to go find another job - I really wanted to start the SheHive, but It was a BIG dream. I had owned my own consulting practice on the side for years, but an actual brick and mortar space? I didn’t know where to start and I really, really wanted to get it right. This wasn’t just a business idea I was putting out into the world - this was my dream. I was putting ME out into the world.

“Find a temporary space and just give it a go. Try it out for three months. Prototype it.”

Prototype It

“Prototype” was all the permission this scientist needed. It reminded me that I could give myself permission to experiment and learn. It released me from the unrealistic idea of perfection. And once I let go of the idea of perfection, the SheHive became so less scary.

The thing about building a business is that it is rarely done by underachievers. The SheHive is no exception. So Andrea and I had to make a conscious decision to call the first 100 days an experiment - to allow ourselves to learn as much as possible in that time, and to give ourselves as much grace as possible to learn from whatever mistakes and failures came along with it. 

We were going to go crazy otherwise.

Thing is, “the crazies” still came.

Making a decision to change your way of thinking isn’t the end of change after all. Change is not a linear process - it zigs and zags. Throughout the past 100 days we have each had our fair share of reminding the other that we are learning - that we strive for improvement, not perfection.

Truth is, this week, as we celebrate the 100 days and the end of the first grand experiment, I’m probably feeling the craziest of the last 100. I’m feeling tired, disconnected and sad for a myriad of reasons. I wrote to a friend, Matt, Wednesday night that I thought “I might just go get a job.”

Matt quickly wrote back and challenged me. “Is a job going to get you closer to the dream of the SheHive you envisioned? The dream you shared with me (last summer) when sat down for coffee at Cafe con Leche’ and you first told me about the SheHive?”

Thank the universe for good friends, mentors and partners that are not afraid to challenge you with love when you are feeling crazy. Thank the universe for a business partner, who is also a good friend, that sends you a blog post on the morning of your 100th day that reminds you of all the reasons of why we do what we do. 

Toast2U

And thank the universe that tonight’s event at the SheHive is Toast2U, our monthly event where all the women who gather celebrate what they have accomplished in the past month. (Join us?!) Tonight I will be celebrating not just the past month, but the first 100 day prototype of the SheHive. Here is just some of what I will be celebrating…​

  • It’s 100 days and we are still here.
  • Over 150 women have walked through our doors to connect, learn and share.
  • We have tap danced, boxed, marched on Washington and created 100+ beautiful art projects with ALL the glue and ALL the glitter and ALL the magazines in southeastern Michigan.
  • We have uttered the word “pussy” more than it has been uttered in the past 30 years combined.
  • We have laughed, and cried, every time we gather (okay, it was probably me that cried about 50% of the time).
  • Andrea and I have had approximately eleventy-billion discussions about our feelings and we still love each other.
  • We have a kick-ass coach, PR person, facilitators and advisory board.

I will also be celebrating…

  • We had to cancel a dozen classes that didn’t take off, but now we have a better idea of what does work.
  • We got some less-than-stellar feedback from SheHivers that stung, but now we are more aware.
  • Many of the people I thought would fill our space never showed up, but 150 others did and they are amazing women!
  • We didn’t follow procedure and a few people snuck through without ever paying for their class because we were too nice to ask, but now we are more comfortable reminding people that we deserve compensation for our time, skills and talent.
  • Our finances were messy for the first 75 days, but now we have a system that gives us the necessary data to make better decisions.
  • We cleaned the toilet 50 times before insisting that the landlord live up to his end of our contract and send out a cleaning crew, and now we are less afraid to ask others to live up to their end of the bargain.
  • We tried to do it all ourselves at first and nearly burnt out, but now we know we have a vast network of awesome advocates that will step up and lend a hand to help see our dream come true because part of it is theirs too.
  • We tried to do it ALL at first and nearly burnt out, but now we know that perfection is an unattainable falsehood.
We’ll forget all of the above from time to time, but someone will always remember eventually - us, a friend, an advocate, a mentor, a coach.

It’s been a crazy, but spectacular first 100 days and I can’t wait to toast it tonight.

​Here’s to the next 100 days and the next grand experiment!

​With much love and gratitude,
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Ursula Adams, MSPOD
SheHive Chief Scientist & Sage

P.S. Read Andrea's thoughts on our first 100 days here.

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