Sometimes (rarely, but sometimes) I wake up before my Roomba, Drama Llama, who begins his daily sweep at 5:00 a.m. I’ll be sitting in the living room, relaxing, and Drama Llama will scare the hell out of me by announcing from the kitchen, with great and loud fanfare, that he’s about to commence THE CLEANING.
Do, do, DOOOOOOOO!
The last day I worked from anywhere other than my home was March 13th. And, like many, I’ve been living life in a holding pattern ever since… for 63 days. Save the hours I am committed to be online working for my corporate clients and the SheHive, I’ve been staying up late, napping when I want, eating whatever I want whenever I want, shopping on Amazon to pass the time when I’m not binge-watching everything on Hulu, Netflix and Amazon combined, and showering about every third day (if my husband is lucky).
You may know me as the Queen of GSD, your go-to for websites, digital marketing and cute dog pics on Instagram (seriously, check it out!) I hit the scene in early 2019 ready to dazzle everyone with my skillz but there’s something you may not know about me.
…I’m kind of a big deal.
I’ve been a patient advocate since 2006, the year I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. It started with a digital newsletter I created, then it turned into a blog. That blog turned into paid blogging. Which turned into being invited to patient advisory boards with big pharma and healthcare companies. Which lead to speaking gigs. This lead to advocacy actually being part of my career. In 2009, I was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis. I started a nonprofit for women living with Inflammatory Bowel Disease in 2012 and worked full-time for that nonprofit for a few years.
If decades of working in change management - both with large organizations as a consultant and individuals as a coach - has taught me anything, it’s this… most of us don’t do well with uncertainty. It’s why people that are worried about losing their job will act in ways that lead to them actually losing their job or why people horde toilet paper when a previously unknown virus alters life as we know it.
We need to control something - anything.
So it’s been surprising to me that the uprising of Coronavirus hasn’t been a bigger deal in my life. I mean - it’s a big deal, but it’s not.
My lawyer said it was okay for me to right this anonymously, so I decided to do just that.
Let me backup...
My new position started as a job I was thankful for. Not super exciting work- but I was okay. A month in, and already, I wasn’t sure whether I was in a toxic workplace. I knew it didn’t feel good to go into work, but that’s adulting, right? Did people actually enjoy coming into work? Was I being bullied? Was I the cause of the bullying that was happening? Am I a good worker? The gaslighting was never ending.